looking forward to a healthy year… mind, body, and spirit.
i want to take a moment to sincerely thank you all for being a part of my life. for taking the time to read what i write, for enjoying my fotos, for your emails, your comments, your jokes, and your love. i appreciate every word and interaction and cherish each one dearly. some of you have been along for the ride since the very beginning… and it just means so much to me to have you here! ❤
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I’M SORRY
I LOVE YOU
PLEASE FORGIVE ME
THANK YOU
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today, and every day…
hey gang, how’s your mercury retrograde treating you?
mercury retrograding in cancer teaches us this…
we are almost half way through the cycle… and now mercury has left the sign of cancer and entered his home sign of gemini…
so what does this mean? — well, the last week or so may have presented you with issues to deal with, revisit, resolve, etc. in the following themes : home, roommates, intuition, nostalgia, mother/mother figure, childhood, emotions, security needs… these are some key themes of the sign of cancer. perhaps you made the decision to move or make renovations in your home? perhaps a past project came up that needed tweaking or you had an “epiphany” regarding something from your past. you may have learned to trust your intuition more, or to learn to come to terms with some emotions you are feeling… MR in cancer offers an opportunity to revisit, rework, and release in these areas of our lives… and with the full moon energy last week, this period has had amplified energy to support it, as well…
now mercury is continuing his backward travel through the sign of gemini – which is where his “home” is. for the next couple weeks we can expect to see our thoughts shift into the themes that gemini represents. these include talks, short trips, local activities, brothers/sisters, electronics, vehicles, writing, the internet, and anything else that involves connecting or communicating. mercury LONGS to connect, and when he is in the sign of gemini, he has the most success in doing so. however, since he is retrograding in this sign, we can expect to see our thoughts become more introspective. we may want to get other people’s advice or opinions on the current relevant matters in our lives. we may revisit a writing project or rework a trip we had planned. any vehicle or electronic issues may arise to be addressed {sorry, that IS one of the bummers about this period – i hope you backed up your computer recently!} and/or we may find people from the past showing up again to rework, reclaim, or revise a situation. there is great opportunity during MR periods… it’s like taking a mulligan 😉
mercury retrograde periods get a bad rap – but i believe it’s because we don’t generally UNDERSTAND what they are for… and we don’t properly harness the energy presented during these times, so many of us are left feeling frustrated and wondering what happened. which is ironic because that is precisely what mercury retrograde longs to be – UNDERSTOOD! i can’t tell you how many times a day i catch myself thinking or saying “i just wish {that person} understood how i felt.” you may catch yourself using some of my catchphrases lately – like, “did that make sense?” or “i just want to explain it so you can understand…” or “that came out the wrong way, let me rephrase that…” or “wait, i didn’t mean to say that…”
astrology doesn’t MAKE stuff happen… it can’t cause events. but time and time again i find validity in the movements and study of the planets and their behaviour. being natal mercury retrograde, i have a unique and tremendously accurate understanding of how this planet’s movements effect our lives in a major way. perception is EVERYTHING in life – and it can be to our benefit or to our detriment. this has been my biggest lesson during this current MR period. i guess it all goes back to being true to who you are. we are not all the same – we are very uniquely different. but i believe that the ways in which we are the same can bring us together and allow us to be ourselves, as individuals… if we could just simply change the way we look at things – at life.
every puzzle piece has importance, significance, and relevance – we just don’t and CAN’T all have the same design, function, or purpose – we must each bring our own individual strengths to the group, the collective, the puzzle itself. and we should never try force a puzzle piece to change its shape… we simply can’t. and besides, then it wouldn’t fit in the puzzle, anyway – you dig?!
thank you for reading, and for your support – it means the world to me! and please let me know any thoughts you have or feelings you wish to share… i love hearing from you! and don’t forget, i also am available for hire to conduct natal astrology interpretations.
hey gang. hope you’re enjoying the weekend.
i unfortunately have not been sleeping very well at all this week and am extremely tired and worn out. i look forward to resting this weekend, and doing not much of anything else…
my brain has been on overdrive, due to this lack of sleep and i’m sure a hundred other physiological aspects that come along with it… and i’ve just been in a lousy headspace today. when i don’t sleep well for several days, i can’t function. as i’ve mentioned in the past, i’ve battled with insomnia for most of my adult life. i’ve found ways to “cope” but ultimately it’s an ongoing process. sometimes things keep me awake, sometimes i just don’t sleep well. it just depends. point is, today my brain is so tired and yet it’s trying so desperately to think, that it’s focusing on stupid crap.
however – it did get me thinking and researching more about a term i’ve been familiar with but hadn’t thought about much until a friend mentioned it the other day.
HSP – Highly Sensitive Person.
google it, it’s a very real thing. even oprah talked about it on her show once, so the mainstream is accepting it, as well. and, wouldn’t you know – i, myself, am an HSP. Continue reading
so – pretty much everyone knows that i used to live in new york city for about 3 years… part of me is {no doubt} still there, and always was and will be. i miss it every day, but i have to trust my heart that i left when i was supposed to leave. the memories i made there were so special, so irreplaceable, and so life-changing that i reflect on my experiences often. in fact, i know that i need to start writing more about them.
aside from being an old soul, i’ve always enjoyed the company of older people… even when i was young, most of my friends were older than me. when i was in manhattan, i lived with a spry, lively, hilarious sagittarius who was more than twice my age, and we were the best of friends. don’t misunderstand – she could keep up with any 30-something i knew! i often don’t speak of her directly, nor do i of many of my friends, out of respect for their privacy. however, this week i just had to post something in honour of the news i received from my former roommate in NYC.
this foto was taken in 2010 at our favourite spot, quigley’s, which is now closed. we frequented “quig’s” at least once a week, sometimes more – depending on fun events like mardis gras. it was like our own personal “cheers” – everyone knew our name. the lady across from me in the foto is my lovely former roommate and still very close friend… we’ll call her “JG”. the gentleman next to her is the quintessential new-yorker with the best sense of humour. the gentleman behind me just lost his battle with cancer this week. his wife, behind him, recently had the same fate last year. i like to refer to them as the “IRISH” – because they are.
these people had a HOUSE in my heart. not just a room, a house. the couple that lost their lives to cancer were like family to me. quite literally – they invited JG and i over for every holiday dinner. most of JG’s family didn’t live in NYC, and obviously none of mine did either. after a while, it became a running joke to call us “the stray cats” because we would just wander over for dinners, as they always invited us and made us feel like family. the IRISH had a home business and they even hired me to take some fotos for their marketing. these people were just so special to me. when i found out about MISTER IRISH’s death, a part of my heart died, too. that may sound morbid, but that’s how special these people were to me. i never got sick of hearing stories about how they fell in love, or how much they remembered about the city changing, or how they knew about the “best little bakery in town” — or just their warm, kind, open, and loving spirits. it chokes me up to think about how special the IRISH’s are/were and just how blessed i am to have met them and been so immersed in their lives {and vice versa}.
things i miss most : morning paddle tennis games with a cup of coffee from the bodega downstairs, long chats in the living room with evening light drenching all the furniture, my endlessly-full wine glass, their amazing taste in art – particularly that italian painting above the kitchen table – i was obsessed with it!!!… what i’ll miss most is the way i felt whenever i left their presence… just so enriched!
so, in honour of the IRISH family, and my lovely former roommate JG – i bought these simple and gorgeous magenta carnations… they are JG’s favourite flowers. i’d often buy them for her, since there are flower shops on every corner in new york. yesterday i bought them in honour of her, as well. she stayed by IRISH’s side in his last days, and told him “the stray cats love you” — that meant a lot to me, since i couldn’t be there to say goodbye. i also love carnations because they may be the ‘bottom of the totem pole” when it comes to flowers, but they last so long and they smell incredible and they will remind me of all the amazing memories i had in NYC with IRISH and JG.
heaven has another angel… and i know he’s being greeted with endless amounts of love.
thank you for reading. have a beautiful sunday – and just please go out and share a little love… with the ones you love, and even with the ones you don’t. the world just needs more of it.
xxoo
FRIENDS!!
ONE THOUSAND of you, specifically! wow – THANK YOU!
that seems like a really big number to me. it makes me feel very humble. and it makes me so grateful that THAT MANY PEOPLE find what i have to say valuable, interesting, or at least somewhat entertaining enough to make a simple gesture like click the “follow” button…
in the two years that food & foto has had life, i have found myself growing and changing right along with the blog. from refining what it is all about, to being honest and open about things, to many twists and turns – we’re almost parallel, my blog and me.
i just was blown away today when i had my 1000th follower sign up to join the fun! and it inspired me to want to do something special to honour it.
and what better to do just that – than a GIVEAWAY!!!???!!!?!!!??!?!
the big question is – what?! what do i give away? it can be anything i want, i suppose. i could find a vendor that wanted to donate something… meh. i can do that anytime. i could give away some healthy-eating coaching… meh. i kind of do that already. i could donate a portrait session… meh. been there, done that. i could give away a camera?!?! dude, that would be amazing… but i don’t have one to give away…
hmph.
would a beautiful print from my lab suffice? your choice – a personalized print from my portfolio. i have an extensive one, you know… portraits, landscapes, editorial, street photography, NYC, california, rocky mountains, macro, food, fine art… what’s your pleasure?!
and my goodness, how do i get people to get involved?
why, you already are!!! just by following my blog, you are already automatically entered in the drawing for a free fine art print of your choice! i will give away 5 prints before the end of April. I will post a blog with choices and the lucky 5 winners will win a print of their choice.
how’s that sound?!
mostly, i just wanted to do SOMETHING to show my appreciation to each of you for following my blog. as i’ve mentioned, this is my personal little playground and i love engaging and hearing from each of you. i may not always respond, but i want to take this time to tell you how much i appreciate the support! as an introvert, knowing what i have to say in print matters… matters.
🙂
to YOU!
that’s right, you. the reader reading this blogpost right now.
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the lady with the latte in one hand while her nails dry…
the guy with the messy hair who just woke up and has his dog nipping at his leg, begging to be taken outside…
the teenager who thinks i’m cool because i keep it real…
the mom who wandered over to my blog and was inspired to create something different for dinner…
the girl who’s my age and who takes comfort knowing she’s not the only 30-something without a husband or kids…
the athlete who loves my smoothie recipes…
the family who wants to hire me to take their portrait. {just email me! :)}
the fellow blogger who appreciates artistry…
YOU!
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all of you.
i wanted to shout out to all of my 700-plus readers who take time to stop in and give validation to the things i say and the things i share. as an introverted artist, it takes a lot for me to “put myself out there” {ugh, i even don’t like the term} however, it gives my heart so much comfort and joy every time someone clicks that “follow” button. i appreciate you all following my blog, taking time to read the wacky things i say, and taking time to comment and share. this wordpress blog forum has really been an amazing outlet for me and i feel such a strong sense of community among bloggers i’ve met.
i am just so grateful to each of you – words won’t really be able to express {remember my natal mercury retrograde?! ;)} but i had to do something to show my appreciation.
this thanksgiving, i’m thankful for so much, as usual… but today i want to focus on being thankful for support. THANK YOU, from the bottom of my heart! you inspire and encourage me, just by reading and engaging.
🙂
hey friends. how was your weekend? i took a long one, and spent some time in denver visiting a few loved ones. my goodness was it a rich weekend. i am so blessed to have some truly amazing people in my life. they are generous and giving and never turn their back on me. i am blessed to have such loving friends!
i had every intent to write “mercury monday” as promised yesterday, but i just ran out of time. i start a new job today and had to tie up loose ends in other ways and just get mentally prepared for the day. i’ll be working in glorious aspen… it is going to be a great season!
so here we are, in the final week of mercury retrograde. how have you been feeling over the last couple of weeks? personally, it’s been an emotional rollercoaster. i mean, i know i mentioned that mercury retrograde periods are when i feel most alive and articulate, and that is very true and still applies {hence the reason i have started journaling more and even started writing a book, finally!} – however, that doesn’t mean i am immune entirely to the energies that come along with it. Continue reading
hey ya’ll. happy monday – did you have a nice weekend? i had a foto shoot saturday, but relaxed all day sunday… did a little work around the tiny home, and organized some things that needed organized – that always feels great, doesn’t it?!
i promised i would write about mercury retrograde for the duration of its journey… and although i’m tired and not feeling as “wordy” as i did last week – well, i’m a woman of my word – so here we go.
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last week i went on and on about how awesome it was that i discovered my mercury retrograde and how i can utilize the energies that come about when it takes a backward journey. thank you so much for reading a little about me! a whole week has now passed and i still feel a little more “normal” than normal, but i also have noticed that my overall ability to just let go of things has come with more ease…
it’s amazing how much “stuff” we carry with us – ideals adopted from our families or social groups, our schooling, our peers, and our every day interactions with things even like the internet, phones, and public places. often times, this may leave us feeling confused and wondering “who we are” or “where we belong” – because for so long we’ve just done what was expected of us, or followed the masses. all the while, those adopted patterns, beliefs, or behaviors, may not actually resonate with who we are as individuals. i’m working very diligently on changing my own personal paradigms, so that i may walk about this earth with more comfort, confidence, and grace… and ultimately, more love… for myself, and for others. sometimes this means changing behaviors or habits within, in order to aid in revealing the most authentic version of myself. Continue reading
i’ve decided to start something new – a “feature” on my blog. i’m going to call it “messages from manhattan” and it will showcase fotos of various sayings or quotes or the like that i noticed and fotographed all over the city during the time i lived there…
here’s one of my all time favs :
wake up! and have a great weekend.
{oNeLoVe}
it’s artichoke season!!!
and thank goodness for that!!!! i wrote a blog or two about them last spring… i just love these beautiful babies. although they do take an awful lot of work to prepare for such a little amount of actual flesh… it’s SO worth it – the scrumptiousness waiting inside doesn’t quite compare to any other…
it got me thinking about how artichokes are kind of like us, like humans…
i know you may be chuckling thinking how the heck can i be like a green pokey vegetable?! well… the way i see it –
an artichoke looks like a flower.
just like us 🙂 Continue reading
happy mother’s day, judi!
i miss you more than there are words for. i celebrate who you were as my mother every day. on your anniversary this year, i was strong – no tears… i even went to work – i smiled and thought of your smile all day. but this week has been rough. i couldn’t figure out why my emotions have been so high… sometimes it just hits me, yanno?! i miss you more than ever, it seems. i’m a “big girl” now, and all i want is my mommy. i want to ask your advice, introduce you to people i meet, have lunch with you, buy you sweaters and scarves, make you smoothies, paint your fingernails, and brush your hair for you. i also miss giving you back-scratches. i know i always complained about doing that for you, but i would do it as my full time job now if i could – and nothing seemed to make me fall asleep like a back-scratch from you… i miss the littlest things. i don’t wallow in sadness when i miss you… i mean, it hurts – they lie when it says it gets easier with time… it actually gets harder, one just finds ways to cope. but i do find that some moments are extraordinarily harder than others…
i always say your death was “bittersweet” because i just can’t find another word to help me accept that it happened. even 20 years later – i don’t know who i’d be if it didn’t happen, and i don’t know how happy or healthy you would’ve been if it didn’t… so all i can really do is be extra grateful that YOU were my mother in this lifetime. that for 13 glorious years, you were the one tucking me in at night and making silly “bear” faces in the car on roadtrips to visit family. all i can do each year on mother’s day is remember the wonderful things you did for me as my mother.
i’ll close with a few of the reasons and memories i have that made you the best mom ever : Continue reading
a friend of mine posted some testimonials on her blog recently… and a couple of them were so touching that it got me thinking about just how much of a difference it makes for me as an artist when someone truly appreciates what it is i do. we ALL feel that way, no doubt – about whatever it is we do that people notice, appreciate, and respect.
the more i fine-tune what it is i am best at and the more i discover who i sincerely am, the more i realize that when we are ALL able to truly be ourselves, with no judgement or fear of rejection, the more we can ALL do what we do best and be mutually respected, appreciated, and noticed for it.
having said all that, i was inspired to share my favourite testimonial someone once wrote for me. i had the pleasure of working with this lovely man on a brisk fall romp through lower manhattan. we shot over 500 photos and about a dozen wardrobe changes in 3 hours. david homyk is a true gentleman, a doll. hilarious and charming, open and endearing. we worked on several images for an online magazine story about david’s music. he has since gone on to do such amazing things with his career and i am just honoured to have had the pleasure of creating some amazing editorial portraits with him. and i mean, it’s not just because he’s a total babe :
“leave it to audrey, she is a master at capturing the authenticity of the moment where the human spirit is available in its entirety…”
– david homyk, singer/songwriter/model/actor, new york city Continue reading
seriously though – whatever.
i mean, i have so much to catch you all up on. not only delicious food and drinks but also photos and updates on practically everything. my entire life has shifted and there is an abundant amount of change occurring in every corner… not only in my own life, but in everything i see around me.
i moved recently. totally different environment. it just happened so fast, everything is happening so fast… it’s for the best, and i’m just going to trust my heart on this one… still in the transitional period, but am integrating well…
my diet is changing more and more every day. i cleansed for a few weeks prior to 12/21 – and i’m sure that effected my body. i’ve noticed now that i can’t tolerate certain foods anymore… i literally spit out a piece of ham over the holidays. i’m not one for eating much meat anyway, but i like to savour it as a treat on special occasions. i couldn’t eat it. i don’t know if it was the salt or if my body is just that smart but i was like, “okay, i can’t eat pork anymore, ever.” i also have been eating less wheat. even though it’s not prevalent in my diet, i can’t stomach it much anymore… it’s hard for me to digest. i recognize this and so i just listen to what my body is telling me… dairy. ohhh – damn you, dairy! i haven’t really been one to drink a lot of milk or eat a lot of ice cream {i’m kind of lying on that one} but i do loves me some cheese. mm mm, but ohhhhh no i can’t do it anymore. some are better than others – parmesan and feta aren’t so bad. i’m pretty much down to a vegan diet lately. and i don’t like soy products or highly processed foods, so that basically keeps me down to eating almost a raw organic diet. and i guess i’m mentioning this because it could greatly shift what this blog is all about. it’s a new year, and mine has been off to a start full of change and i’m free-flowing in the wind… a blank canvas.
what else?! so i moved, i’m vegan… oh, my meditations are getting better. i had a lull for a bit, but i feel like i’m back on track and in a good practice again. and there is something happening in my life in the field of love – and it’s powerful. my heart is transforming, that’s all i can say for now…
i began writing a book. mostly about my life… particularly, what i went through shortly before, during, and after the shift of the calendar day december 21, 2012… the end of the mayan calendar… my life hasn’t been the same since…. it’s gonna be a good one! 🙂
my grandmother passed away. i’m flying back east to be with my family for a few days – that is the blessing in disguise about these things… it’s always nice to see family, but it’s a lousy reason to get together… it’s okay, i’m at peace about it, no doubt.
so… i’ll be back next week and i hope to use the new moon energy from friday to catapult me into the next phase. i’m keeping my heart wide open, and making decisions only from that place… because it FEELS RIGHT.
still seeing these everywhere i go…
“you always buy the unique-looking produce… the ones no one else wants, the oddballs, the misfits!” — a coworker said to me.
it’s true.
i like anything out of the ordinary. because me?! – i’m out of the ordinary…… i mean we are all unique, just like everyone else, right?!
but i’m a very old soul… and i’ve seen a LOT in my some 10 thousand years… and in my current waking life, i often feel like some of the fruits and vegetables i buy – discarded, overlooked, passed-by, out-casted, and just plain weird. but dude, i’m totally still edible – and you know – some things get better with age… 😉
well… i found this potato particularly interesting because it kind of represented me. not only was it heart-shaped, as i obviously am, and which i find a lot of random things that find their way into my visual path are, but it is also kind of two different colours. it almost looks as if a garnet yam and a jewel yam are intertwined. it got me thinking about how i believe we all have a duality to us. i was having a conversation with a friend about all the changes going on in the world right now – the talk of 2012 doomsday, or the hope of a 2012 arising – in love and light, and consciousness, perhaps? and we were discussing how we all have a “dark side” — and some of us publicly show it with acts of violence or utter projection as to inflict sheer pain on the person receiving it, and some of us albeit perhaps not as violent, still keep it very much hidden, which can take a TON of conscious effort. Continue reading
i feel like KISSing today. Keeping It Seriously Simple.
i have a long weekend and week ahead of me. i am working straight through to my birthday, which coincidentally happens to be on thanksgiving this year. i plan to cook a feast for myself and meditate under my stars all night. i’m kind of weird… even though i work in the public and enjoy helping others, i’m actually quite a loner and am extremely introverted… so it’s totally okay 🙂
anyway… i feel really good lately and even though this is true, i do realize not everyone is so “zen” during the holidays, and therefore i’m trying to remember this simple truth over the next week :
i saw this on a building once when strolling through the lower east side of manhattan. i obviously had to take a picture. two days later i walked that same block and it had been painted over. i still have it as my screen saver on my phone and i try to live by this rule every day. it’s such a simple truth, and i find that when i react to situations with love, with only the highest version of myself, things are just better. the world needs more love. it’s part of our “job” here, to spread the love that we ARE… in fact, it’s the only reason we are here.
oNeLoVe.
so… here’s the thing about me… or at least, here’s how things have typically been for me…
although i see the world as very “gray” — i LIVE it very black and white. what i mean by that is… it has appeared that for me i’m either super high and on top of it creating world peace the whole nine… OR, i’m super down and depressed feeling useless and hopeless and thinking even the flowers are out to get me… there is hardly an in between. seldom did i feel comfortable, content, “in a groove,” or most of all – peaceful. that wasn’t always something i could FEEL and feel okay with…
i suppose this stems from a shaky childhood and the survival instinct of maturing faster than most due to losing a parent. it could also have to do with my astrological chart, or the fact that i am a very very impatient old soul… but the truth is, it has always been hard for me to find a balance, or to find some comfort, some love, and some peace in the every day. i speak of this in past-tense now because i can, because i am confident in saying that i no longer live like that. i’ve spoken a handful of times now on how i feel i’ve changed over the last year, and am continuing to. i’ve written about not only feeling the change but seeing it actually play out. i make conscious choices each day to effect how i see life. what’s frustrating is when i see people in life for who they are, and all they want to do is fake it — it’s just annoying, because i want to be like “you ain’t foolin’ me” but… i have to be a friggin’ politician about things sometimes and i’m kind of over that…
i digress, as usual. Continue reading
“i’m starting with the man in the mirror, i’m asking him to change his ways – and no message could’ve been any clearer, if you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and then make that CHANGE!”
— michael jackson, lyrical genius.
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well, it’s wordy wednesday. and i have a lot to say this time. it’s been quite a week. a HUGE full moon last wednesday and i’m not talking viewable by a telescope huge, i mean like – effect me on all levels huge. i have always talked about how i am a huge astrology buff. i follow zoe moon astrology, and you should too! she’s fantastic and always right on! astrology and horoscopes are NOT exactly the same. i’m not saying i follow my horoscope and freak out if “my crush” doesn’t ask me out even though my horoscope said it would. i’m talking about astrology – a study of the movements of the planets. it’s a very in-depth and fascinating field that i have studied more and more as time has gone on… also, i am very “in tune” with the planetary changes. and i FELT this last full moon like, with major force. it was intense!!! Continue reading
food & foto 