Tag Archives: mom

{beautiful lilies}

21 Aug

in today’s hectic and fast-paced world, i believe it is very important to remember to stop and smell the flowers… as often as you can. breath them in deep!

particularly if they are stargazer lilies – they are so intoxicating!

today is my mama’s birthday, and always think of her when i see lilies… so these are for her 🙂



happy birthday, judi!

 

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{i miss my mama}

10 May

happy mother’s day, judi!

mom

i miss you more than there are words for.  i celebrate who you were as my mother every day.  on your anniversary this year, i was strong – no tears… i even went to work – i smiled and thought of your smile all day.  but this week has been rough. i couldn’t figure out why my emotions have been so high… sometimes it just hits me, yanno?!  i miss you more than ever, it seems.  i’m a “big girl” now, and all i want is my mommy.  i want to ask your advice, introduce you to people i meet, have lunch with you, buy you sweaters and scarves, make you smoothies, paint your fingernails, and brush your hair for you.  i also miss giving you back-scratches.  i know i always complained about doing that for you, but i would do it as my full time job now if i could – and nothing seemed to make me fall asleep like a back-scratch from you… i miss the littlest things.   i don’t wallow in sadness when i miss you… i mean, it hurts – they lie when it says it gets easier with time… it actually gets harder, one just finds ways to cope.  but i do find that some moments are extraordinarily harder than others…

i always say your death was “bittersweet” because i just can’t find another word to help me accept that it happened. even 20 years later – i don’t know who i’d be if it didn’t happen, and i don’t know how happy or healthy you would’ve been if it didn’t… so all i can really do is be extra grateful that YOU were my mother in this lifetime.  that for 13 glorious years, you were the one tucking me in at night and making silly “bear” faces in the car on roadtrips to visit family. all i can do each year on mother’s day is remember the wonderful things you did for me as my mother.

i’ll close with a few of the reasons and memories i have that made you the best mom ever : Continue reading

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