Tag Archives: thoughts

{happy 12th birthday to food and foto dot com!}

22 Mar

it’s my blog’s birthday today! 😀

WOOHOO!

it’s hard to believe that it’s been 12 years since i started this cute little blog and created my website!

it’s been such a fun journey and i have thoroughly enjoyed this artistic and expressive playground. not only do i relish in taking fotographs and eating delicious food, and rambling about random things, but i very much also delight in writing about said things and sharing it with all of you!

if you are new here – WELCOME! and thank you for stopping by!

here’s a little something i wrote 12 years ago about myself… so funny to look back at that time in my life. i remember exactly where i was sitting when i very first sat down and decided to create this space on the internet. a space to express myself, to share my passion for food and fotography, and to explore my storytelling in a personal way.

i pour a lot of my heart and soul into this space and what i love most about it is that i can be as creative as i want in how and what i share. i also feel like this blog holds me accountable in a way… as in, helps me set aside time to be creative. i don’t have a lot of social media and although i do try to maintain it, this blog and website has been and will continue to be my main focus. it’s personal. it feels different. 

in 12 years i have been fortunate to have over 1800 of you wonderful readers subscribe to my blog and take the time to read and engage… and for that i humbly want to express my GRATITUDE. especially to those of you who have been with me the entire time… from the start… encouraging me, supporting me, being my personal cheerleaders! THANK YOU! my hardcore fan, ANT – you know who you are! thank you for your unwavering dedication to supporting me and for your amazing friendship! i wouldn’t be here without you.

this year i am focusing a lot on maintaining food and foto dot com in a more consistent fashion. when i first started, i was blogging up to 5 times a week – whew! and for a little while, i wasn’t blogging at all. now, i believe i have found a healthy balance. my life has taken many twists and turns in 12 years. you’ve seen me living in a tiny house ,traveling to new york, cooking yummy things, drinking yummy things, growing yummy things, and writing about all kinds of things like astrology and the moon… and of course, my kitty. sometimes i’ll look through my old posts and i think to myself, “wow, did i really just say all that on the internet?!” haha. but most of the time i laugh at myself and realize that in 12 years, a lot is bound to change… this blog, the world, life, ME…

{then and now} – wow!

and some things haven’t changed… i am a creature of habit and my “look” and “style” and overall marketing within this space is something i have not wavered from… i put a lot of thought and attention-to-detail into my blog, my business cards, the food i cook, my greeting cards, my art, and everything that is food and foto dot com – the aesthetics, the representation, the feel – all of it! this blog is an extension of WHO I AM… much of which is consistent, reliable, and faithful… and some of which, is ever-changing, ever-growing, and ever-impermanent. and i celebrate all of that! 😀

so i’ve learned to have patience and grace and appreciation with myself over the years…and mostly – have a little fun!

and i hope you have a little fun while you’re here – click on some things, learn some things, teach me some things, share some things… and remember to keep it seriously simple!

AND! this is still hands down one of my favourite fotos of all time :

also – this one is a classic :

{it’s true!}

❤ ❤ ❤

nom nom click click!

 

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{this one goes out to judi}

21 Aug

happy birthday, mama! ❤

i miss you so much! ❤

i miss you more as i get older – ardently, i just want to be able to take you to lunch or bring you flowers or treat us to a pedicure or meet for coffee or go for a walk or call you on the phone and complain about something that in the grand scheme of things is/was probably irrelevant or unnecessary but you would make it feel that much more important because you loved me so much and everything i cared about mattered to you. i also wish i could call you to talk about the hard things, too… and i just know you’d give the best advice and offer the best most loving support. i wish i could hear you say my name even just one more time.

not a day goes by that i don’t think about you… your love, your heart, your spirit, your mind, your energy, your humour, your kindness, your gentle nature, your hair, your eyes, your hands, your scent, your voice… the list goes on and on.i

i remember you had a tender and fragile heart of gold. i remember you could play the piano with such grace and ease. i remember you could read sheet music like it was a language to you… even songs you had never even heard before… if it was in front of you, you could read it and play it as if you’d been playing it forever! {anything by phil collins always comes to mind!} i remember it also was so crucial to you to teach us music – it was written in your soul. i remember you making funny faces on long car rides to entertain us… we called it the “bear face.” i remember you did this silly thing with your hand to crack me open and make me giggle when i was being stubborn or ornery. i remember you constantly encouraged me to write and to be creative {SO many days spent rearranging the furniture without asking you, and you would come home and praise me for it anyway!} i remember before you passed away, you sweetly requested to be buried with one of my stories that you had laminated and wire-bound for me. i remember you taught me how to use a typewriter and now i can type almost 90-words-per-minute on a computer. i remember nothing was as important to you as your children. i remember your favourite meal was stuffed shells {maybe i should make that today?!} i remember you were soft-spoken and understated, but also incredibly tenacious and resilient. i remember people noticed you, even though you didn’t want the attention. i remember that everyone remembers you. i remember that you left a remarkable impression on everyone you engaged with. i remember you had a quiet strength that i feel has been instilled in me because of you.

i remember that your very loving spirit and energy and influence are still present here, helping me every day to be better… and you leave me pennies… and you reconnect me with and/or bring people into my life that also remember you… those who share you with me… with whom i relate, connect, and learn from… and even those that never had the privilege of knowing you… the mothers in my life that give me motherly love… that accept me and honor me and show up for me… those who have “adopted me” ❤ !!!

{*** LP, PL, SJ – shout out to you… you know who you are, and i’m forever thankful to and for you! ***}

when someone compliments me in just about any way, i pretty much always say – “i got it from my mama.”

and another thing! — why does my cat remind me of you?! ha! one of my fondest memories since you’ve been gone is when we threw you a birthday tea party! i would love to do that for you again. the older i get, the more i look like you. lately, i keep my hair short – which i personally like for lots of reasons, but also mostly because it makes me look more like you. last week, i was treated to a dinner out for the first time in a long time, and i carried your denim purse with me… it’s so 80’s and it’s so fabulous! {still can’t believe all the fashion stuff eventually circles back around – haha!} there are lots of things that were yours that i kept for many years and eventually let go of… but some things i held on to, and i love that you find ways to remind me that you’re still with me, and within me. most of that comes with an intangible feeling in my heart and not from material things. ohhh, how i am continuouilsy so thankful for that!

i am so thankful that you were and are my mom and that i am your daughter! i will continue to celebrate you and all that you did and all that you showed me and all the ways i am like you! i love you, judi.

to my readers : thank you for having the space to allow me share these very personal and intimate thoughts about my beloved mom on this special day. thank you to those of you that have been on this journey with me all of these years. thank you to those who reach out and show me love through your thoughts, words, and actions.

to all of you : love the ones you love with all the love you have. always and forever… 

 

 

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{happy holidays and happy new year!}

5 Jan

greetings!

happy holidays and happy new year! {also – happy mercury retrograde for all you astrology fans out there!}

i hope you all are doing well! also, i wanted to welcome my new readers to this tiny little space on the world wide web. thank you for taking time to subscribe and follow along – i truly hope you enjoy the time you spend here at food and foto dot com.

as a personal goal, i am working to post new blogs at least once or twice a month… but ideally, my aim is to post once a week. as usual, you can expect the topics to include all things food and foto related – as well as the great outdoors, cool people and places, occasional astrology jargon, and general musings/ramblings from yours truly.

for example : 

even though our temps have been in the mid 50s all week, this morning i was thinking about the weather and how i really never liked winter… this became particularly true when i lived in the high country in colorado and worked at 12,000 feet elevation {brrrr!}. i don’t enjoy the cold, although i do know that some people really do! the winter season is just not my favourite. however, i have recently learned to embrace each season for different reasons.

as humans, we are just as much a part of nature as nature itself. i sometimes feel we have really lost that connection and we often forget that we, too, have seasons. whether it be the “aging” process, or a relationship, or a job, or relocating/moving, or any other variables in life, we all go through seasons. and i believe that the winter season is a time to relax, reflect, and regain strength for spring. it’s a time to hibernate and go within, and most importantly – a time to REST!

personally, i {now} enjoy the downtime that winter has to offer more than I ever did in the past. of course – a lot has changed in my life which has offered me new perspective on this time of year… but nevertheless, i have certainly learned to embrace this season in a different way. plus, {in true introvert form} i enjoy working on a lot of puzzles this time of year – one of my favourite hobbies. 😉

also, i am not really big on “resolutions” – but i did make a short list of things i want to do more of this year. that includes :

  • practice my piano/keyboard
  • learn how to use {and use!} my sewing machine
  • spend less time on social media and more time on my blog
  • grow a vegetable and flower garden closer to my home
  • get back into my exercise routine
  • volunteer somewhere in my local community
  • welcome more ways to sell my greeting cards

do you have any resolutions or goals this year?

 

 

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{DIY up-cycled candles}

25 Oct

i love to repurpose things! do you feel the same way?

i know from personal experience that so many items get tossed out and/or thrown away, unnecessarily. i spent a large portion of my career in grocery retail trying to educate people on this subject… but i still don’t know if most people are acutely aware of where our “trash” goes. i feel like our society tends to have this mindset of “out of sight, out of mind.” that said, it is known that some of the highest physical peaks in parts of this country are not something like a mountain-top, but actually more like the tip-top of a landfill.

take that in for a moment… isn’t that crazy to consider?!

all of that said, i love to find ways to “up-cycle” items that would normally get thrown away or would end up in a landfill. recycling is a great option, but sometimes i think we tend to forget about the fact that we can also repurpose things. it’s easy to throw a decent glass jar into a recycling bin… but have you ever considered if you can reuse it for something else?

case and point : i have been loving these yummy french yoghurts that i have recently been buying at my local grocery store. i like them for many reasons… yes, they taste great! and that’s a major selling point! but the main reason i like them is because they come in glass jars. i LOVE to support and also repurpose products that choose to use glass… i’m all about minimizing plastic consumption!

i’ll get off my soapbox for now, but i encourage you all to think about what you throw away… and perhaps {re}consider a creative way to reuse some of the items you may normally toss out or recycle.

and now… onto today’s blog. 😉

a friend of mine gifted me some old candles that had been stored for a long time. the wicks were no longer usable, but the candles were in good condition and still had a great scent! so – i decided to take them home and reuse them to make some DIY {repurposed and up-cycled} homemade candles.

as i mentioned, i had been saving these yoghurt containers. i also repurposed some old candle containers.

i used my double-boiler that i scored at a local antique store {YAY!} i purchased the wicks and wick-holders online, and then i simply re-melted the wax and allowed it to cool slightly before pouring. this is not exactly a perfect method. there is a bit of science to candle-making, which i’ve recently discovered. temperature plays a factor, and in this case my DIY at-home method typically created a ‘sink-hole’. however, i also discovered that in my case, this issue was easily rectified with a second pour. plus, i’m not generally aiming for perfection with this project. {wow – can’t even believe i’m saying that!}

so – overall, i think they look awesome and i am proud of myself and the dedication to creation!

have you ever made your own candles and/or repurposed old ones? i would love to receive your feedback!

happy creating!

 

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{stargazer stages}

3 Mar

stargazer lilies are one of my favourite flowers! they are not only stunning to look at, but the scent is simply intoxicating!

i appreciate the intricate details within every flower blossom of the stargazer lily. i love to watch each one go through every stage as it blooms and opens. it makes me think of the phases and stages we as human beings go through in life. it’s like a flower blossoming… our journey may start by feeling closed off to the space around us… unsure of ourselves or “hiding” from the world… then in a divine way, we slowly start to open up and reveal our true inner beauty… and ideally as we grow and blossom, the world accepts and appreciates that beauty and all that we uniquely are, and we are ultimately embraced in all of our glory.

but just like a flower, it doesn’t really matter if anyone notices or appreciates or embraces. the essence of a flowers purpose is to simply be. it is beautiful with or without the recognition it deserves. and if we are lucky enough to be in the presence of such beauty, it serves us well to pause, notice, admire, appreciate, and absorb all that which IS.

and we are given that opportunity every single day.

 

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{i am a ritualist}

12 Jun

what can i say?! … i am a creature of habit.

i believe i have always been this way, but i don’t believe i have always lived this way…

over the last couple of years i have been particularly adamant about creating a healthy routine in my life… i have found myself purposefully setting intentions of a grounding “ritual” in my daily life from which i could draw strength.

at the very core of those routines and rituals is my desire for overall well-being.

i’m talking about wellness – inside and out – a sense of harmony… and i do believe that all starts within.

the more within myself i look, the more i realize that i absolutely THRIVE in routine. i believe part of that is because i recognize that all living things are in routine… and all living things exist by “obeying” certain laws of nature, many of which we as human beings are more removed from than i would prefer. nature is cyclical, and it is {for the most part} pretty predictable… therefore, nature also thrives in routine.

think about it…

all that to say, the more in touch with nature i’ve become, the more i’ve realized that i am as much a part of nature as nature itself. my body thrives in rhythm and routine, just as nature does.

one of the things i have been wanting to adopt as part of my healthy routine was including a daily vitamin supplement. although i generally eat a very well-balanced healthy diet, i’ve frequently struggled with finding a vitamin supplement that fit my desire for harmony and also fit my standards for well-being… which, i admit, are pretty high. 😉

and so it is with great enthusiasm that i say – I FOUND THAT!

which brings me to my purpose for creating this blogpost… my new best friend :

my ritual vitamins.

these wonderful vitamins came into my life serendipitously… as do most things that are “meant to be.” 🙂

as i said, i had already set the intent of finding a vitamin to add to my daily routine that would give me what i was looking for… an extension of my already healthy lifestyle choices, and SIMPLICITY.

what i love most about ritual is their simplicity. they have taken the guesswork out for us. instead of stuffing a tablet with unnecessary fillers and/or many of the nutrients that come from an already healthy diet, they’ve only included the 9 nutrients that most women lack or are deficient in… basically, it does what i have always believed a vitamin supplement should do… supplement, or as they say – “fill in the gaps”…

the 9 essential nutrients in ritual are :

  • vitamin K2
  • vitamin D3
  • vitamin B12
  • boron
  • iron
  • vitamin E
  • magnesium
  • folate
  • omega-3

so, instead of buying upwards of 4 or 5 bottles of different supplements, many of which include unnecessary fillers, you get all you need in 2 daily capsules. part of the allure for me is that it truly epitomizes the concept of “less is more.”

another reason i love ritual is the transparency – literally and figuratively speaking. the capsules are literally see-through… and the company is transparent by allowing the consumer to trace the source of each ingredient on their website.

ritual vitamins are made for women. they are non-gmo, vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, and the company was founded by a woman. these vitamins are designed specifically for women. for one dollar a day, you can invest in your health by supporting an outstanding company that is truly revolutionizing the vitamin industry. plus, you get bioavailable nutrients that help you look and feel your best.

i have chosen to be an ambassador for this incredible brand because i believe in their mission and i am an advocate for voting with your dollars, as in putting your money where it matters. the $30 a month investment is one that provides a wealth of health.

please visit this link to start your ritual today : food and foto loves ritual

and stay tuned for my personal review on how this vitamin supplement has affected my overall well-being.

 

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{beautiful lilies}

21 Aug

in today’s hectic and fast-paced world, i believe it is very important to remember to stop and smell the flowers… as often as you can. breath them in deep!

particularly if they are stargazer lilies – they are so intoxicating!

today is my mama’s birthday, and always think of her when i see lilies… so these are for her 🙂

happy birthday, judi!

 

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{nyc – through the eye of my camera phone}

17 Jul

i am working on a new volume of “memories in manhattan” and will post one next week… in the meantime, here’s a post about new york to keep the theme going 🙂

i took a trip new york in june… i had been wanting to go back for a visit for quite some time, as it had been about 5 years since i had been there. often times, i think part of me wants to live there again, so i was eager to experience the city once more to see how i felt about being there.

i had a wonderful trip, as i figured i would. the weather was a little ridiculous – as in sweltering hot. but outside of that, it was nice to feel the energy of that amazing city, again. new york has a way of making you feel on top of the world; as if the whole place belongs to you. as an introvert, it’s strange to me that i can be surrounded by people but still feel like i’m in my own little bubble. the “hum” that is always in the background doesn’t feel distracting to me… it’s a strange dichotomy that i have always appreciated.

all that said, i think i realized that i do not wish to live in a place like new york again. i long for a country life – on a farm somewhere, growing food and having lots of animals. of course, that may change – after all, we are human and our desires come and go as we move through life.

it was wonderful to be in new york once more and to walk around and take the subway and just feel the energy… i immediately settled back in to the “way of life” there and even had people asking me for directions – and i knew them! that’s also a good ego boost.

i didn’t pick up my camera too much… i guess because since i lived there for so long, i took so many pictures already and this time i just wanted to kind of experience it in a different way. of course, i did have my camera phone with me – so i captured a lot of snapshots with it.

here is a gallery of fotos from my trip – i hope you enjoy! :

 

until next time…

 

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{memories in manhattan – volume 5}

15 May

even though i don’t miss the winters in the northeast, or winter in general for that matter, i did enjoy the variety of weather that seems to roll in and out of new york. particularly, the evening rain. there’s something about a late night drizzle… it seems calming to me.

as i was looking through old fotos of my days living in new york, i came across a fun memory of a time when some visitors came to town and i helped them squeeze in as many “tourist attractions” as possible, since they were only there for two days. it made me feel pretty cool when they asked for suggestions. maybe because it made me realize that i had been in the city long enough to not only know my way around, but to be somewhat of a tour-guide.

one of my favourite places to visit and view the city was the empire state building. being able to experience the city from that perspective is something to behold. i only visited the empire state building twice during my time living in nyc, and both times were memorable and exciting. this particular night was memorable because it was very cold, and very wet. it was one of those kinds of rain that was almost like a mist, making the visibility low and the mood high.

the way way top

when my friends and i decided to go to the top of the empire state building, we didn’t realize that the very very top would be closed off due to wind and the aforementioned low-visibility. my friends didn’t care, and neither did i. by the time we decided to make our way to the destination, we had already been wandering the city for a good hour, sans umbrella… and it didn’t seem to bother any of us. besides, a huge part of the experience was being together – and for me, seeing the excitement on their faces, and living vicariously through their enjoyment. furthermore, the line was much shorter and there were fewer people on the tour… so it felt like we had the whole place to ourselves.

because of the rain, i found myself taking less fotos and spending more time reveling in and soaking up the moment… and doing my best to keep warm!

if i close my eyes, i can whisk myself away to some of those moments, and revisit and remember the experience so richly.

i love his hoodie

i love my hat

did i mention that these friends of mine are like the empire state building… in that, they are very very tall?!{especially standing next to me – haha!}  😉

 

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{memories in manhattan – volume 3}

27 Mar

after my experience with the cute stranger on the subway, i quickly started to realize that my fondness of portraiture was beginning to grow rapidly. when i was in college, i never really wanted to fotograph people… my ambition was to work for a place like j.crew and fotograph flat lays on white seamless. i think i would still enjoy something like that, but my point is, i was totally intimidated at the thought of putting people in front of my camera. 

the ironic thing is, part of the reason i was able to save up some money to even move to new york, was due to fotographing some portraits for clients during the summer months while i was living in delaware with a friend. i took the train up to manhattan twice and was able to squeeze in a few sessions on long weekends and put that money toward my moving fund. i think it was during that summer that i really started to fall in love with portraiture. 

the following fotos were taking during one of my first portrait/headshot sessions upon moving to new york. the only person i really knew in the city at the time just happened to be a film-maker, and he knew lots of aspiring actors and actresses that were in need of good headshots. 

i met this lovely young lady in central park for our session. she is of french descent, and i just love her unique features. she was a natural in front of the camera, and it was during this session that i started to really fine-tune my creative portrait eye. 

Continue reading →

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{memories in manhattan : volume 2}

20 Mar

there really is no place on earth like new york city. 

granted, i haven’t exactly been all over the world, but the most fascinating thing about new york is the fact that literally every culture in the world is represented in a 7-mile radius. it is something to behold, indeed. 

you can almost see my apartment from here

i remember noticing this right away when i first landed in the city. hearing all the different languages in the background as i shopped for groceries or seeing all the various colours of faces as i walked the streets or rode the subway. i love the condensed mini-world that new york offers with its existence. it was so inspiring to me to have such diversity at my fingertips. it became quickly apparent that i could walk 20-blocks in any direction and be magically whisked away to a different continent, in a sense. 

one of the other interesting aspects of living in the city is seeing celebrities walking around like “regular people.” one of my first memories was around thanksgiving, when i wandered into a little market on my block to shop for some artisan snacks to share with my roommate for the holiday. it was the cutest little store… not bigger than maybe 1000 square feet. packed from top to bottom, wall to wall, with delightful goodies and imported treats of all kinds. i remember standing in the small isle way of the freezer section, gazing at some pasta, when to my right i noticed a person approach. so i looked up as to get out of the way and quickly saw that julia stiles was walking in front of me. we exchanged demure smiles as we passed each other, and all i could think to quietly utter was, “happy thanksgiving.” she nodded and we parted ways. i guess in my mind, i figured she had chosen that little store to shop in rather than a big supermarket, so it was evident she wanted to go slightly unnoticed. even though i’ve always really admired her acting, i didn’t want to fan out and try to strike up a conversation or ask for an autograph or foto. i just wanted her to feel like a regular person for a moment. i quickly realized that a lot of celebrities choose to live or stay in NYC as to “blend in” and feel a little more sense of normalcy in their lives as opposed to living in say a place like los angelos. i have never been to LA, but i just get the feeling it’s a lot more “celebrity obsessed” than manhattan island. as it is, there are so many people walking around new york and so much is happening at any given moment, and that makes it easier for anyone, not just a celebrity, to “blend in.” 

dramatic shadows everywhere

i also found this to be true of myself. i’m an introvert at heart, and i don’t really like to draw attention to myself or have unnecessary interactions. one of the things i loved so much about living in new york was feeling “always alone but never alone.” shortly after moving to new york, i had someone tell me that, and it really struck a chord with me. the hustle and bustle of that crazy city just never ever stops and yet as an introvert, i found a way to detach from it and live in my own little bubble. no one was really paying attention to what i was doing. i guess sometimes they were, as i will regale in other volumes, but for the most part, everyone is just doing their own thing and no one is really taking notice of anyone else. this gave me a sense of control in the chaos… peace within the whirlwind. once i became more and more familiar with my neighbourhood and the metro system, it became joyful for me to throw on my headphones and enchantingly saunter through the streets, discovering my way to and through various explorations. i enjoyed people watching very much. perhaps people were also people watching me, but if they were, typically i didn’t notice – just like everyone else, for the most part.  

i remember taking the L train somewhere one day, and i was sitting across from this adorable young girl wearing headphones and drinking a kombucha. she was dressed so uniquely herself… mismatching tights and a poofy skirt with a denim jacket adorned in various pins, and her hair was cut super short and spiked with traces of leftover hair-dye in it. there was something about her that was so cute and charming and i almost immediately had the desire to want to take her picture… not just like, on the train, but actually take her out and have a portrait session with her. i remember sitting there and observing her blissfully unaware nature and thinking to myself that i wanted to give her my business card and offer to fotograph her. i pondered for a few stops, eventually talking myself out of it as i watched her get up and exit at 14th street. i immediately regretted not having the confidence to approach her, but i also remember thinking that maybe she wanted to go unnoticed, too.

bustling city at night

the most serenditipous thing happened like a month later. i saw that same girl on the same train. i was shocked! at the time, i didn’t think it was possible to see the same person twice while one was living in new york city. there were far less people on the train this time, as it was fairly late in the evening. alas, once again, i got too nervous to speak to her or give her my business card – how silly was that?! as many days continued to pass when i took the L train, i was hoping i would bump into her again. but in 3 following years, not once did i see her face again. to this day, i kind of regret not at least trying to talk to her, as i would’ve captured some amazing portraits if she had let me. however, all in all, i did learn a lot through that experience and it taught me not to let an opportunity or moment pass me by. as time marched on, i became more comfortable approaching people that i thought my camera would like to get to know better. 

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{memories in manhattan : volume one}

13 Mar

a little preface here :

i have been thinking about my experiences living in manhattan… i’ve been thinking about it a lot, in fact. i hope to make a trip up to the city in june, and so i have been mentally reflecting back on my time there.

i thought i would start writing about some of my experiences. i enjoy writing so much, and yet i don’t do it enough. i try to keep a journal, but my fingers just can’t keep up with my mind most of the time. i’m a much faster and better typer than i am a writer, which kind of makes me sad but also makes me thankful that i can take time to sit down and type out my thoughts when i need to. having said all that, i really wanted to start a series here on my blog which will highlight some of my favourite experiences living in the big apple. some of the stories may include fotos, some of them may not. i don’t have any expectations regarding this, but i do know it’s something i want to do.  and so to honour this desire of mine, i plan to update this collection of memories on mondays.

i thank you in advance for taking this journey with me, and enjoying these memories with me…

and without further ado, i present to you –

memories in manhattan : volume one

—

i’ll never forget pulling up to 20th street with the half-empty u-haul and seeing my new roommate standing on the curb with her friend and his dog. i can’t remember the dog’s name, but i’m sure ms. judy will refresh my memory if i ask her. i was so eager to meet her, as we had been exchanging emails back and forth for about a month. my boyfriend at the time was living in manhattan and had helped me land this living situation by visiting it prior to me moving there. i met my roommate, miss J, online when she responded to an ad i had placed looking for a roommate/apartment. it was so serendipitous to have her reach out to me, because i had struggled finding a place to live that was reasonably priced and met some of the requirements i had set for myself. of course, i wanted a safe living situation and preferred a female roommate. i also wanted something on manhattan island and i had a certain budget i didn’t want to bend on. ms. judy met all my requirements and she even shared her name with my mother, which i found to be a fantastically sweet nod from the universe. 

i opened the truck door and stepped my foot onto the concrete jungle for the first time, looking up in awe at the trees all around me. it was the 1st of october, and the trees were ripe with a rainbow of colours and the air had a crispness to it that i wish i could bottle up. i took a deep breath and immediately reached out my arms to greet ms. judy. she gave me a warm embrace and proceeded to kiss me on one cheek, then the other. she pulled back a little and said, “in new york, we kiss.” my soul felt a warmth i was unfamiliar with and to this day has not been duplicated. her friend and neighbour then introduced himself and his sweet pooch, both of which i hugged {and ‘new york kissed’}. 

i fell in love with my neighbourhood immediately. the tree-lined street just off the east river had been built shortly after WW2 and was one of the only “complexes” in manhattan. it was tucked away just far enough off the bustling streets to feel like its own personal city full of park benches, fountains, and lots of greenery! right below our apartment was the most perfect little bodega that ms. judy and i strolled into shortly after unloading my things to grab some pizza for dinner. everyone working there knew her by name. the place was packed with just about every kind of goodie one could imagine. it became quickly apparent that this was going to be a place i would frequent – all hours of the day. 

although i remember those very first moments of arriving in new york city, i do not remember much else about that day. my room was already furnished, so it didn’t take me too long to unpack. i had been downsizing my things prior to moving to NYC, and so by the time i arrived, i had packed and unpacked so much it was like a science. 

i do remember the following few days… i pulled out my brand new camera that i had recently bought with money i received from selling my car. it was 2008 and digital cameras were much more expensive at the time than they are now. it was my ambition to make that happen, and sure enough, i did. 

ms. judy had given me lots of information about the neighbourhood, and in true audrey form, i had done a lot of research on the area as to {somewhat} know what to expect. i stepped out into the cobblestone-lined walkway just outside of our building and i began snapping fotos.

i think this was one of the first pictures i ever took in new york : 

my first foto in nyc

i was still a somewhat budding photographer at the time, and looking back at some of the first images i took in new york makes me kind of giggle – as i can now see how much i’ve grown as a photographer and artist.  Continue reading →

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{how seashells are like humans… or is it the other way around?!}

20 Jan

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i love the ocean. i love everything about it – the movement, the sounds, the life that’s in it, the deep mystery of it… my soul resonates so intimately with all things ocean-related.

one of the things i love most about living in north carolina is the fact that i can go to the ocean in december! last month, just after the holidays, we took a drive to the shore and spent some time with big blue. i love to beach-comb and i have been gathering quite a collection of shells lately.

as i was laying all my seashells out the other day, i was admiring the variety of what was in front of me, and i got to thinking about how similar seashells and humans are. we are all so uniquely different, and yet we all come from the same place, essentially. maybe not the same exact place, as we are all born into different families and have different backgrounds and stories, but we are all born the same way and created the same way, just like seashells.

seashells all come from the ocean, a vast sea of wonder. we, as humans, all come from the same wondrous creative process. we all look different and have different shapes and colours and sizes – just as seashells do. some of us are not fully developed or some of us are broken – just like seashells. some of us have lots of stripes and stories to tell, and some of us do not – just like seashells. some of us are a little more ‘clean cut’ and some of us are a little ‘rough around the edges’ – just like seashells. some of us get tossed around by life, just as seashells get tossed around by the ocean waves. some of us leave the ‘ocean’ a lot sooner than others. we are very similar – humans and seashells.

at the end of the day, we all come from the same ‘ocean.’ we all are born human, and that is what connects us. our differences are what make us unique and give us unique perceptions and views of the world. those differences are what allow us to be able to learn from each other. in an ideal world, we would all appreciate our differences and recognize that those differences are what makes us all able to truly work together, and to formulate this big ol’ puzzle called life into a clearer picture.

my wish for the world is that we truly start to see each other.

 

 

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{what real strawberries look like}

6 Dec

something i need to write about is how i spent my summer vacation… even though it’s long passed now.

one of the things that took up the majority of my free time this summer was participating in a community garden. it was basically one of the best things i’ve ever done for myself. growing your own food is truly one of the most rewarding things one can do! i would constantly remark, “all i did was put a seed in the ground – and this happened!” because i was constantly blown away at how cool nature is! my cucumber plants literally took over and my neighbours were calling it “the cucumber farm” 😉

the reason i bring this up is because i inherited a small strawberry plant in my summer garden plot. many of my neighbours had strawberry plants and i was fortunate to have one reseed itself in my plot. i didn’t get a lot of strawberries from it, but the few i did harvest looked like these strawberries. they were more cone-shaped than heart-shaped. and i’m telling you – the flavour in these things is just out of this world! SO sweet and SO juicy and SO delicious! better than any store-bought strawberry i’ve ever had!

do you ever compare conventional produce to farmer’s market produce?! the differences kind of blow my mind! the last time i was at the grocery store looking at apples, they were bigger than a softball! that’s just not normal. or fruit so waxy i could use it as a candle?! yikes.

for me, i like things to be as close to their natural state as possible. food, soil, water, me, and everything in between.

and that got me thinking about these strawberries i picked up at the farmer’s market last week. i was looking at them and decided to snap a couple fotos because i was thinking to myself, “i bet there are lots of people out there who don’t even know what REAL strawberries look like.” 

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these strawberries were SO full of flavour, too! something else that lacks in conventional produce. maybe it’s got something to do with mass producing them and lack of nutrient-rich soil.

anyway, i love that i can still find strawberries this time of year – as north carolina has a year-round farmer’s market and excellent long growing season. i hope to find some more when i go back this week!

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{happy birthday to me!}

22 Nov

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looking forward to a healthy year… mind, body, and spirit.

i want to take a moment to sincerely thank you all for being a part of my life. for taking the time to read what i write, for enjoying my fotos, for your emails, your comments, your jokes, and your love. i appreciate every word and interaction and cherish each one dearly. some of you have been along for the ride since the very beginning… and it just means so much to me to have you here! ❤

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{zen space}

7 Nov

oh, how i have missed blogging!  and i have missed interacting with my readers! i hope you all have been well and that life has been treating you with love and grace.

so much has happened this year {and last year} for me and although i would love to go into great detail about it all, after much consideration, i have decided to refrain.  i have been taking some time to journal some thoughts down and i think that will be a good way to release it all first. then, if i decide to share, i will.

it suffices to say that i have grown tremendously over the last 24 months and i sit here writing this post with an overwhelming sense of gratitude and relief! the past is in the past and i am here, now. although, the time is always now, you know?! if we are fully submersed in the moment, we are always in the now.  the past is behind us and we can’t change it and the future doesn’t even exist yet… so all we really have is now. and it is always NOW. i am {re}learning and remembering how crucial this simple truth is to keep in the forefront of our minds. it is far too easy to get caught up in other things and especially other thoughts.

and here at food and foto, we like to keep it as light-hearted as possible. or at least, as “positive” as possible. i have been thinking a lot about what we choose to focus on; what we allow our minds to be occupied with. and for me, it is extremely important to find a way to disconnect from our seemingly ceaseless thoughts… to find a zen space. and that doesn’t exactly have to be a physical place. although – it can be found in nature, in a park, in your bedroom, at a church… but basically, being “zen” is truly a state of mind. it has little to do with location.

however, it is true and i do find that some places bring me to a more “zen” feeling than others. for example, i did like living in the mountains and especially in the tiny home, as it was a life-changing experience… one that many people dream of. however, i never quite felt “zen” while i was there. at least, not like i do when i am near the ocean. i love listening to the sound of the waves as the water ebbs and flows… it reminds me to breathe in and breathe out. i love the smell of the salty air breezing through my hair… it reminds me to stay in touch with my intuition and appreciate the moment. i love sense of wonder and awe i feel for the unknown that lies beyond and beneath… it keeps me grounded and humble. truly, nothing makes me feel more zen than being near the ocean.

i am a water baby at my core and i basically believe i am {or was} a mermaid. therefore, i feel truly at home when i am near the vastness of the big blue. something about being around the water gives me a sense of peace like nothing else does. it is truly my zen space.

with all that said, i would like to share these fotos i took while visiting the atlantic ocean recently. i had a little fun playing around with some different filters. also, it’s pretty satisfying to be able to dip your toes in the warm sand in november!

beach-web-14beach-web-2beach-web-1 beach-web-3beach-web-4  beach-web-6 beach-web-8beach-web-7 beach-web-9beach-web-10 beach-web-11 beach-web-12beach-web-20beach-web-15beach-web-16 beach-web-17beach-web-18 beach-web-13

where do you find your zen space?!

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{my first post in 2015 – an overdue update… with tons of pics!}

6 Feb
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last day in the tiny house…

hey gang – how’s the new year treating you so far?  did you make a bunch of resolutions? are you off to a healthier new you?! seems like many of us make those kind of promises in honour of the new year.

me?! i moved… again. and so i figured it was time to clue you all in.

i’ve missed blogging… but i have literally been living like a gypsy for the past month – and i simply didn’t have time to update as often as i had before.  plus, my camera is still broken so i haven’t been fotographing as much.  i’ve been relying on the trusty iphone to supplement in that regard… but this will all change very soon… it’s just life, i guess.

in my last post of 2014, i mentioned that i had to leave the tiny house… it was something i wanted to do but also something that was hard to do. it wasn’t so much that i wanted to leave the house, it was more that i wanted to leave the area.  it’s a beautiful place, but i am simply not cut out for the cold weather or the culture. if i could have taken that tiny house and put it on wheels to travel with me, i so would have. but alas, it’s a stationed tiny home and that wasn’t an option. c’est le vie. it was an experience i will never forget, and one that changed me and molded me into who i am today.

anyway – i can’t go into the whole story because i could seriously write a book about the circumstances around my final decision to leave the valley. it was just a series of events, some unfortunate, that paved the road to open up new directions in my life. and i have no regrets about it. i feel content in my choices and in the things i’ve learned, and i am excited for a new beginning in my life.

i’ve always been one to change my surroundings if i feel the need… and this move was no exception. home is truly where the heart is… so as long as i have ME, i’m good.

and so without further ado, here are some snaps of the haps in january… enjoy! i look forward to reconnecting with you and hope you all are well!

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this message really helped me as i made the final decision to leave colorado… the best word i can use to describe all the feelings… bittersweet.

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i will miss seeing the deer in my front yard every morning… that’s for sure.

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as i was packing and downsizing even more, i came across all these notebooks i saved from all my years working as a shift leader in NYC. i miss that job and that city so much, but it was an experience like no other and one i will cherish.

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fracking is a big thing in colorado – i would see signs all the time and people in the town where i lived were not at all ashamed of expressing their opinions on it… do you see the hand-painted sign on the bottom? it reads : “fracking gassholes” — haha! i loved it.

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i took myself to breakfast here on moving day… it’s called heidi’s deli. they make one of the best pastrami sammies i’ve had this side of the hudson… i will miss them.

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… and their ham, swiss, egg, and avocado croissants!

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i swear i wear this hat every day, lately…

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i was nervous moving in january… it’s not something i tend to plan out, what with unpredictable weather and all. but i was so thankful that wedged in between all the snowy days, was sunny friday – the day i moved my things out of the tiny home.

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i left this for the new tenants… cuz i’m like that.

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i also “left my mark” under the kitchen sink… 😉

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moving day lunch – cubano tacos. AH-mazing.

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while in gypsy mode, i was staying with some friends out in the sticks… literally. i helped them chop and stack some wood for the winter… okay, mostly i stacked. 😛

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i’m learning to incorporate more salads into my diet in winter… my dear friend miss M taught me about the simplicity of putting cooked veggies in with your greens to add more dimension and warmth during the cold months… so simple, so easy.

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gettin’ artsy with a clementine…

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… and some window light!

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who wouldn’t love cooking your oatmeal on a wood stovetop?!

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i was SO thankful to be able to spend plenty of time in the private hot springs near carbondale… it was so healing, so sacred.

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doesn’t this look so bizarre and cool?! it looks like some kind of alien snow crop circle or something… but it’s really just an indentation from a cross-country ski pole…

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the roaring fork…

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this reminded me of new york…

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never grow up…

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moving day dinner… i will miss the local grass-fed burgers!

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ran into a little weather on actual moving day…

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i’m so grateful my chauffeur {kind of a joke – a good friend drove me the entire 8 hours to my destination!} was fully prepared with snow tires!

…and i’ve pretty much been eating a lot since i got here!

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homemade vegan pizza…

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with tons of fresh mushrooms, spinach, garlic, and jalapenos!

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good wine, good friends…

and my goodness, is it warm here! and i love that!

❤

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{a personal post : bye bye 2014, my last blog for a little while, happy new year, 2015 – 8, new beginnings, cycles, the universe, etc etc…}

31 Dec

wow.

so i’m sitting here… alone… with my baba black lager. it’s new year’s eve. the last day of 2014. the final day in this calendar  year… 2014 was a numerology #7. 2015 will be a numerology #8. i could write a whole blog about the significance of numbers, etc. i just think cycles are so interesting… cycles of all kinds… the seasons, numbers, etc.

does anyone else get all weird on this day? like, it’s just another day really… but somehow i find the energy to be soooooo … intense. in many ways.

like, i woke up restless – what’s that about? and i slept for like, 9 hours last night.

oh yeah, it’s not just because it’s new year’s eve… it’s because things are changing… again. at least for me, personally… in my life, everything is changing… including where i live… i’m saying good-bye to the tiny home… with a bittersweet feeling in my heart.

you know they say that the only constant in life is change. how funny is that!? like, well – you can guarantee this – stuff’s gonna be different tomorrow. not everything will be different, but a lot of it will… because that’s how life rolls… it doesn’t care if we are ready for the change or not… it just keeps on changing. people change, astrology changes, rules change, the weather changes, laws change, … most things around us do NOT stay the same… including the people in our lives, and those we love.

so what’s my point? 

i dunno, maybe i don’t have one. maybe i just wanted to sit down in front of my computer and keep it real with you readers… and myself.  maybe i’m tired of trying to “keep it together” all the time… as in, always having the perfect thing to say and taking so much time to think about how to express myself… because i’m so scared of being misunderstood. maybe i just wanted to be spontaneous and sit down and write while i felt the desire, the thoughts flowing, the keys being struck with force and purpose… maybe i want to just say whatever i feel and not be worried about how everyone else is gonna perceive it…

maybe i’m just feeling the baba… 😉

so how do you feel about the idea that the only thing we can be sure of is that things change… how does that make you feel? is it comforting to know that with each moonset and each sunrise, that life can end and begin all over again?!  does that give you peace to know that tomorrow… tomorrow… the sun will come out?! or does it make you kinda crazy to know that you can’t ever really count on anything?! does it give you total anxiety to feel like as soon as you get comfortable with something or someone, there is damn good potential for it to morph into something else entirely and seem completely illusive?!

i feel like there is a balance… as with most things in life.

most days i’m so thankful to begin anew… to wipe clean the “yesterday” that never really exists in the first place… to wake feeling renewed and purposeful again. i learned a lot about the beauty in each new day when i lived in new york… it’s amazing how that city just doesn’t stop for anything… it doesn’t care if you didn’t get the memo, it doesn’t care if you aren’t walking fast enough, if you missed your subway stop, or if you aren’t feeling its embrace. when living there, i had to learn how to be so completely present that nothing seemed to really effect me to the point of not being able to continue to be in the moment.

my challenge this year is to get back to that space…

i’ve been practically beating my head against the wall trying to figure out where i went… what happened to the person that seemed to be able to really stay in the moment… to embrace it even when it was chaotic, unpredictable, and sometimes down-right scary.  where did that audrey go that i spent 29 years trying to find when i met her in new york?!

she didn’t go anywhere… it took me all of 2014 to realize that.

i mean, seriously. just this past week i had the total epiphany that nothing is “wrong” with me… and if there is in fact anything that i feel uncomfortable with – that I, personally, have the power to change it. i can and always do create change in my life when i am feeling a need for it. sometimes it’s not always clear to me, but it’s almost like i do things without even thinking sometimes… and then when i’m on the other side of it, i go, “oh yeah… i see why we did this.”

i guess that’s true with everything in life… hindsight is 20/20, right?!

well, all i know is… i’m feeling more comfortable with change… dare i say, i’m embracing it. i’m not saying i love “change” during every moment while i’m in it… but i’m okay with the idea that everything seems “fleeting…” because really… if it’s true that the only constant in life is change… well, then i wanna make sure to be so immersed in each passing moment, that i love it for what it is… recognizing that it will never again be the same… that each moment really is a gift. maybe it’s not a gift wrapped in colourful paper and bows, maybe it’s not a gift we asked for… maybe it’s a gift we didn’t realize we needed.

but it’s still a gift… if we can be open to receiving it…

personally, i’m feeling happy to be letting go something while completely surrendering to something new and exciting. for me, my personal changes happen to coincide with the calendar change… but i’ve always been a firm believer that you can choose to make a change at any given moment in your life. you don’t have to have anyone validate your decision to change, you don’t have to have a party or mark it on your calendar… hell, you don’t even have to invite anyone. you can choose to make changes in your life while washing your dishes… you can choose to create a new life while driving to work… there are no rules for that. you can live life on your terms, but in order to do so, you must live life on your terms.

does THAT give you comfort?!  it sure does me… 🙂

so, as i ring in the new year and celebrate new beginnings, my heart is filled with gratitude for all the loving people, places, and things i’ve experienced. i just want to continue to hold a space of gratitude… and to be open to new things as i step boldly out of the familiar and into the unknown…

happy new year! – to each and every one of you. thank you for following my blog, for engaging and for taking time to read and give this blog purpose… i’m truly grateful to each one of you.

❤

 p.s. – i’m not gone forever… just a temporary hiatus while i adjust to some new things… i’ll be back to blogging in no time… 

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{words to live by}

27 Nov

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——–

I’M SORRY

I LOVE YOU

PLEASE FORGIVE ME

THANK YOU

———

today, and every day…

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{30-something}

21 Nov
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audrey’s perspective

it’s my birthday weekend!

Fun

classic audge – circa 2006

and i’m trying really hard not to feel lonely, weird, and slightly freaked out.  i kinda wish i could watch that show that was big in the 90’s… it may offer some comfort. but i do know one person that always makes me smile and feel better about life and all its weirdness – the late, great, george carlin.

i thought i’d share this with you in celebration of my “getting older”… you may have already heard or seen this, but it’s worth a second round, for sure!

———

GEORGE CARLIN’S VIEW ON AGING

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions. 

‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key. 

You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead. 

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weee!

‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16!

And then the greatest day of your life…You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony… YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!! 

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! She TURNED; we had to throw her out. There’s no fun now, you’re just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed? 

New York City

happy me, on my 30th

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away.

Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone. 

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would! 

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60. 

You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!  You get into your 80’s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime.

And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’ 

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’ 

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!! 

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never grow up

HOW TO STAY YOUNG 

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay ‘them.’ 

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. 

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s. 

4. Enjoy the simple things. 

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. 

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive. 

7. Surround yourself with what you love – whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge. 

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help. 

9. Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is. 

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. 

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER : Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. 

——— 

LOVE-1 bdaysunset-1

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